This month marks 2 years since my Dad passed away. I have been having dreams(or nightmares) about it all. The memories have come flooding back and they usually come at a not so great time. I find myself tearing up at the store, in the car(a song triggers it), and it usually is in front of one of my children. They still look at me like I've grown a third arm or something if they see that I'm crying. Hannah was only two, so she doesn't remember him. Olivia wasn't even born yet, but I like to think that Grandpa got to tell her about our family and get to know her. Maybe that is why she is such a good girl. Hopefully my boys have some memories of him, I need to help them remember. I just made a photo book of Grandpa for them, from when he was a baby to an adult. I hope we look at it often and remember the good times. I miss him a lot and I need to be better about teaching my kids about him. It's been 2 years, but my heart still aches. I really feel sad for my Mom, she hasn't had the easiest time with all this. She is still struggling and I wish I knew how to help her. I guess we have to want to be happy, before we can really BE happy. I read a quote somewhere recently and have made it my new motto.
"Now and then we have to pause in our pursuit of happiness, and just BE happy."
I also had a really awesome RS lesson a couple weeks back about choosing happiness. It was a real eye opener. We can make our lives what we want them to be. It is through our decisions and actions that it happens. There was a quote in the lesson that I really liked (I'll probably slaughter it). It went something like this, "It is our reaction to our adversities, not the adversity, that writes our life story." I wrote it down somewhere, but can't find it. I'll have to email the lady who gave the lesson and get an exact quote. I have been suffering from depression lately(off and on) and this lesson really has helped me. I know I need to be happier, and I am trying. I always have to count my blessings, because I have been very blessed. It is usually through our trials that we realize what we have.
Tuesday, September 13, 2011
The boys started a few weeks back, but I am just getting around to posting the pics. Kylan started 3rd grade, he has Mrs. Parker. So far he is doing really well. Caleb is in 1st grade this year, he has Mrs. Butts and she is amazing! Hannah just started preschool. She is going to Step by step preschool and she has Mrs. Melanie. She told me this morning that she loves her teacher, so it is going great!